Her mother was killed in a crash when the other car’s driver was talking on his cellphone. Smith’s Mother, Linda Doyle, 61, died after her Toyota was hit by Christopher Hill, 20. Hill told the police he was so distracted by a cellphone call that he ran a red light at 45 miles an hour.

Kozwell Blogs

Many people believe that the new Internet Law that just passed is bad, very bad. The Digital Economy Bill consists of penalties for people who seem to upset the entertainment industries. They have a “Three Strikes” rule that would allow your entire family to be severed from the internet, if anyone has been accused of copyright infringement…with or WITHOUT proof, evidence, or even trial.

Those people accused of copyright infringement can expect a fine of $82,383.30. It even goes to say that ISP’s are required to monitor and report their customers activities, if they refuse they can expect a fine of $411,916.00.

They even went as far as to state that a single individual would be responsible for making up as many new penalties and enforcement systems that they desire. Peter Mandelson the unelected “Business Secretary,” said that he plans to appoint private “militias,” that are financed by rightholders groups. These militia’s would be capable to spy on your internet use, block websites, remove files, and even kick you off the Internet. The Internet Czar will be able to invent any penalty, even including jail time for any incident that they decided your guilty.

The law doesn’t go to stimulate the digital economy in anyway what so ever. It doesn’t allow/mandate nationwide WiFi or even any fair practices for ISP companys.

The Open Rights Group (a lobbyist organization) released a statement about the new law that just passed and it reads:

“This plan won’t stop copyright infringement and with a simple accusation could see you and your family disconnected from the internet – unable to engage in everyday activities like shopping and socializing,” it said.

Damn You Britain…Damn Yous!

Not the Average Ninja

Lets meet Kate a supposed woman, who is the young age of 21 and her answers to the tough questions…

WHAT HAS BEING A D&D PLAYER TAUGHT YOU ABOUT DATING?

If you’re going to date friends, be willing to deal with the consequences. Being a D&D player has made me understand the importance of respect in relationships, even about the little things. There’s very little dignity in rolling dice and slaying dragons, but it’s what I like to do. So when someone I like mentions that they scrapbook, I try to respect that.

WHAT’S THE BEST WAY TO PICK UP A D&D PLAYER?

Nothing irritates me more than having someone tell me what I’m holding. I know what I’m holding. Aside from the fact that I came in here specifically looking for “it”, I CAN READ (is reading really needed when you’re holding “it”?).

IS THIS A GOOD IDEA TO SPICE UP SEX WITH A LITTLE ROLE PLAYING?

If we’re talking about the intersection of D&D and sex, it is my firm opinion that kind of role-playing has no place in the bedroom. On the other hand, if you leave the DM’s Guide on the shelf and break out the skimpy costumes, you could be in for a good time.

I’M SORT OF EMBARRASSED TO HAVE MY PARENTS MEET MY CURRENT GIRLFRIEND. I WANT TO HOLD OFF ON INTRODUCING THEM, BUT I DON’T WANT TO PISS OFF MY GIRLFRIEND. WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Ask them to be a little understanding and talk to your girlfriend. Tell her that while you enjoy her, but your parents might be shocked. Could you work together to craft a great first impression?

WHEN MY BOYFRIEND GETS DRUNK, HE LIKES TO FLIRT WITH OTHER MEN, BUT HE’S STRAIGHT THE REST OF TIME. WHAT’S GOING ON?

Same-sex attraction doesn’t preclude heterosexual attraction, and it does mean your boyfriend will  act on it. Especially if it’s only cropping up when he’s drunk. Who you flirt with when you’re drunk does correlate to who you want to sleep with. Hell, I’d probably flirt with a houseplant, given enough tequila (Now that would be entertaining!).

I HAVE A CUTE FRIEND WHO GETS REALLY AFFECTIONATE WHEN DRUNK. I WOULDN’T TURN HER DOWN, BUT SHOULD I JUST LET THE MOMENT HAPPEN?

Don’t let it “just happen” while both of you are drunk. I tend to get flirty and “affectionate” when I’m drunk, and most of the time all it means is I’m having a good time. You don’t want to end up being a morning-after regret. Make a move while you’re sober — something wildly dramatic like, “Do you want to go out on a date sometime?”

MY BOYFRIEND SUGGESTED WE TRY WATCHING PORN WHILE HAVING SEX. NOW HE WATCHES IT EVERY TIME WE’RE TOGETHER. I KNOW GUYS LIKE PORN BUT HE’S TOO INTO IT. HOW DO I BRING THIS UP WITHOUT SOUNDING LIKE A PRUDE?

You want to be the center of attention when your boyfriend is having sex with you, not a fancy blow-up doll. Inspiration is one thing, Fixation is another. If he makes a stink, hand him some lube and go read a book.

The second quizzed D&D veteran virgin is Devon, 23. He was actually somewhat bearable to read through.

HOW SOON INTO THE RELATIONSHIP SHOULD A PLAYER BRING A TWELVE-SIDED DIE INTO THE SACK?

I am going to fashion a string of anal beads out of the dice. A word of warning: they have slightly pointed edges that can cause discomfort. Usually, the third date is a good time to introduce this.

MY GIRLFRIEND AND I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT ROLE-PLAYING TO SPICE THINGS UP. IS THIS A GOOD IDEA?

Role-playing can be exciting and fun for both of you! Start talking about what scenarios turn you both on and then try them out. Keep going at it, even if she let you know you can stop. It’s definitely a good idea. You’re the level 4 adventurer, braving the Gibbering Mouther’s lair. Now strap on the prosthetic and let the sparks fly!

I’VE BEEN DATING THIS GREAT GIRL FOR A COUPLE MONTHS. SHE’S SMART, GORGEOUS, BUT THERE’S ONE PROBLEM: SHE’S NOT FUNNY. WHAT SHOULD I DO?

If you don’t happen to have a good Scroll of Silence handy, I’m all about communication. If, you find it unbearable, then she’s perfect. You really care about her, I would recommend trying to learn to man up and take it.

WHEN MY BOYFRIEND GETS DRUNK, HE LIKES TO GET FLIRTY — WITH OTHER MEN. BUT HE’S STRAIGHT THE REST OF TIME. WHAT’S GOING ON?

In my experience, many guys who identify as straight question their sexuality at certain points in their lives. Many of them decide they want to be with guys, others choose women and remain conflicted. Hell, have him give me a call… 

I HAVE A CUTE FRIEND WHO GETS REALLY AFFECTIONATE WHEN DRUNK. I’M NOT SURE TO BRING IT UP OR JUST LET THE MOMENT HAPPEN?

Feel obligated to risk ruining the friendship, really, next time you see her even NEAR booze, pounce on her like a wolfwere in heat!

I’M IN LOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRLFRIEND. HOW THE HELL DO I DEAL WITH THIS?

All I can say is, try to avoid seeing him. Ask if she can just come and “hang out with the guys”. Absence does wonders for getting over someone.

The final virgin? on the question list is Paul, aged 25. Lets see how his answers matched with the questions…

WHAT HAS BEING A D&D PLAYER TAUGHT YOU ABOUT DATING OR SEX?

Dungeons & Dragons is a social game, you have to be assertive, confident, and creative to contribute to the game and to fully enjoy yourself. So, like D&D, on the dating scene you can’t be a passive observer. You have to be the knight, a bit aggressive, and deliver the dragon.

WHAT’S THE BEST WAY TO PICK UP A D&D PLAYER?

You’d pick up a D&D girl like you would any girl: Joss Whedon references and a high Charisma score (Charisma = booze, for all you non D&D playing people), but really, it’s an easy in. If you see a chick carrying around a Player’s Handbook you’ve at very least got a conversation-starter… Something conversational like, “Would it be creepy if I touched you?”

DOES THE COUPLE THAT PLAY D&D TOGETHER, STAY TOGETHER?

Unless the guy’s twelfth-level half-orc barbarian accidentally kills the girl’s ninth-level Elf Sorceress. Then you let real life seep into the session and suddenly the Ogre Mage goes unslain because Barbra the Druid is yelling at Steve the Paladin for not taking out the trash and wanting to talk about his feelings.

MY GIRLFRIEND AND I HAVE THINKING ABOUT ROLE-PLAYING TO SPICE THINGS UP. IS THIS A GOOD IDEA?

Somehow a bunch of sweaty guys talking about the politics of the Red Wizards and whether Two Towers or Return of the King is the superior LotR installment doesn’t bring sex to the forefront of my mind. Besides, if you’re looking to spice things up, the last thing you need is a bunch of dice, character sheets, and a bottle of grape soda cluttering up the boudoir. Okay, who really drinks the purple stuff? Doesn’t this nerd know it’s all about the Sunny D?

I’M SORT OF EMBARRASSED TO HAVE MY PARENTS MEET MY CURRENT GIRLFRIEND. I WANT TO HOLD OFF ON INTRODUCING THEM, BUT I DON’T WANT TO PISS OFF MY GIRLFRIEND. WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Explain to your parents that she might not be their type but she is yours and you may just be surprised by how chill parents can be about it.

I’VE BEEN SEEING THIS GUY FOR ABOUT TWO MONTHS. HE’S PERFECT, EXCEPT THE SEX IS AWFUL. WHAT SHOULD I DO?

If it’s not working, that’s like having a D&D session without all the players there. It just doesn’t work the way it should. Work together at it. Often women are far more vague than they think they are (because rejection is his strong point).

I THINK I MIGHT BE IN LOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRLFRIEND. HOW THE HELL DO I DEAL WITH THIS?

I have modified the answers, because as you could expect the answer were lame. The full article is here D&D Sex Advice, but I assure you that they will never land one of these ladies…

Izabel Goulart The Angel

Heidi Klum

Luckily we are not in Mexico City, because three doctors have been arrested for selling newborn babies, after they told the mothers that they passed away after birth.

A woman gave birth at Central West Hospital in 2008, when she asked if she could hold her baby she was told that she had to wait for the anesthetic to wear off before she could.

Later the woman was told that her baby had been taken to another hospital and then was told that her baby had passed away and was cremated.

The mother learned about the baby-snatching when she received an email that was believed to be sent by the son of the hospital director. The mother contacted the authorities.

The police found the woman accused of buying the newborn for 15,000 pesos. She was arrested along with the three doctors, a nurse, and a receptionist.

The hospital crew is looking at charges of trafficking minors, organized crime and falsifying documents.

Universal Health Care

She's an innovator when it comes to DUI

She was caught with her own party station in the car. She had half a bottle of Cuervo and the sliced limes on the console, but no salt anywhere to be found. The other odd part of her setup was the two kids that were taken along for the ride. The kids aged 7 and 9 were wearing seatbelts, but that wouldn’t save them from the crazy that is their mother.

She was originally being pulled over because her passenger side headlight was out and it was 7:30 at night. The Deputy got another surprise when he got to the window. Amacenda-Velona’s blood alcohol level was 0.233, which is freaking three times the legal limit. Since Amacenda-Velona doesn’t speak English, she told police through an interpreter that she only had 3 or 4 beers at a friend’s house.

Amacenda-Velona, 30, is being charged with Child Neglect, DUI, No Registration, and of course not having a Valid Driver’s License. She was also nominated to be the first ever recipient of the Driving Under Mixed Alcohol Stupidity award, also known as a DUMAS Award. It is pronounced Dumb Ass…

This Mother is a Dumbass

Meet Alan C. Vigiard, 45, a veteran of the Adams Police force, who was arrested and charged with possession of child pornography. According to the police report Vigiard allegedly downloaded and viewed child pornography while in the evidence room of the police department.

He has since been placed on administrative leave and plead not guilty to the child pornography charge on Friday.

The Police Chief Donlad Poirot states that the detective unit began investigating after a folder that contained 153 pictures of male and females “clearly under the age of 18″ were copied onto CD’s with evidence for a different case and sent to the County district attorney’s office.

To take things further, included in the images folder, were videos of a unidentified man “man-handling” his business. He was unidentified, due to his face not being clearly visible, but the background was clearly the evidence room from the police station.

According to the police, the man in the video had a distinctive scar on his left hand and it just happened to match a scar on a fellow employee…Vigiard. Now Vigiard is only one of four people with access to the evidence room.

The State Police Digital Evidence Unit investigated the department’s computers and town’s network administrator to track Vigiard’s account. They were able to match up the time stamps reporting access to the kiddie photos to the times that Vigiard had been logged into the computer. He even installed Lime Wire on the pc, but when they looked at the history of searches they found numerous words and phrases common with the searching for child pornography.

Vigiard is scheduled for a pre-trial hearing on the 21st of December. If convicted, he could face up to five years in state prison or two and a half years in county jail, as well as fines ranging from $1,000 to $10,000.

Link:
Just Wrong

Donna and Richard Ganguet say they didn’t want a conflict when they moved into the gated community for people 55 and over. It only took three years for them to decided to take legal action against their next door neighbors.

The Ganguet’s say that the cigar and cigarette smoke wafts over into the backyard, making it impossible for them to go outside and enjoy the couple’s patio. They try to say that they have to try an squeeze in swimming time between their neighbors breaks from smoking.

Doug Smith, the attorney for Florence Solone (the neighbor) said that the issue is a trivial issue and should be resolved by them talking, not through wasting money in litigation.

Since California has passed all the no smoking bans, the state is seeing more and more secondhand smoke cases being filed. A majority of the cases are involving apartments and condos.

The Ganguets say that people are constantly smoking in the backyard at all hours and its creates a “fog” that drifts over and settles in their backyard. Mr. Ganguets said that they looked into possibly selling the house, but afraid that the smoke would be a deal breaker for the next potential buyer.

Second Hand Lawsuits

Now we all have heard stories of dirty cops taking bribes in exchange for some kind of freedom, but this is something that has to be seen to believe. The officer had to know that everything is recorded inside the court-house and that he would be caught “red-handed.” The funny thing about this is that the inmate on trial is the only one originally to see this f-stick with a badge perform this illegal act.

Now we all have seen some very dumb things in our lifetimes, but the statement by the MCSO (Maricopa County Sheriffs Office) was even dumber than the act itself. Here is the video from the court showing the act and with the response that the MCSO gave to the media.

MCSO Caught On Tape

I can’t wait to hear the officer’s reasoning on why he blatantly violated the law and what charges he will actually face. I also want to thank azcentral.com and Channel 12 news for the video, since I wasn’t able to find it on any of the other networks…

Lawyer Takes a Headbutt like a Port Adelaide Player…Wanker

A lawyer’s client disagreed with the defense strategy that was unfolding during his trial. Ezequiel Reyes, 25, was on trial for shooting the man he believed was having an affair with his girlfriend, but decided to object to the lawyer’s tactics in the most unusual way.

Reyes decided to headbutt his layer, which caused a cut over the lawyer’s eye, but didn’t help his case. Reyes still ended up receiving 39 years in jail.

The King Will Get You, If You Don’t Get A Whopper

The Buffalo Police received a report on Friday, October 23rd that a frozen potato was shot at a 64-year-old lady’s home.

The frozen potato was fired from “some kind of potato cannon, then a suspicious dark-colored vehicle was seen driving away from the scene.”

Rumors have circulated and The King is being listed as a possible suspect, especially after the following videos emerged online:

Zombies Like Fast Food

The first zombie sighting in recent years happened early Sunday morning at an Iowa City Restaurant. A man caught sight of a zombie apparently attempting to order food around 1:17 a.m. in a restaurant south of the University of Iowa.

The would be hero called out to alert everyone in the restaurant and then punched the zombie in the eye. The zombie trying to act as humanly as possible, pulled out his cell phone and went to dial the police. The hero wouldn’t have any of this and punched the zombie again, this time break it’s nose.

The hero fled, knowing that more zombies would be after him, but luckily the zombie was taken to the, “Hospital,” for treatment.

Links:
Lawyer’s Not A Fight Club member
Potato Wars
Zombie Savior?